He Cheated On Her & She Wants To Know Why – The Perfect Definition Of The 21st Century Relationship

I came across this video going viral on twitter with the tag #hurtbae and at first I had passed on watching the video because I thought it might just be one of those overly analysed clips I usually see on twitter, but as the video moved over to Instagram I felt inclined to watch it. Obviously the 59 seconds time lapse for Instagram was not enough for me to grasp all the video was trying convey and I was at a point where curiosity had gotten the better part of me, so I looked for the full video and I came across it on The Scene.


Immediately I finished watching the video all I felt was anger and sadness; And the reason was not the fact that a woman who was cheated on shared her story for the world to view, because if we are honest people have been through worse. I felt anger because in the 6 mins and 44 seconds of this video, there was never a point where the guy showed remorse or acknowledged the damage he had done to the lady. I felt sadness because it took me back to all the moments my friends and I have shared lamenting over similar situations and I certainly knew the hurt and pain she was going through when made me so certain I was going to write this post.

Like the title of this post suggests, ‘He Cheated On Her & She Wants To Know Why – The Perfect Definition Of The 21st Century Relationship’, this video clip is getting the traction and reaction it is getting because almost every woman actively dating or even retired can relate to the situation.

It is the classic she gave him everything and he took her for granted and before most men will say “we have also been on the receiving end of similar situation” let me state, this could be anybody but this particular video is using Kourtney as a point of outreach.

There were a few things that really struck a chord while watching the video, one of them was when Leonard had asked her “If you go through my phone and check my emails to find whatever, why wont you just leave?’

Kourtney replied ‘I don’t know, I think I was stupid’.

Every woman can relate to this, you love a man so much yet, he hurts you so much and you know it is time to pack up especially if he does not care anymore, but you stay back to try and salvage the relationship. Hoping, praying, wishing it will all get back to normal and you can relish in the fact that you did not give up. However as the case of leonard and Kourtney was, he was never going to be redeemed because as he stated; ‘He just did not want to commit’.

There is a possibility Kourtney knew Leonard was not on the same page as she was, but emotions and her love for him did not let her see he was taking advantage of her and even if she saw it, she was not strong enough to break away and find someone else who was worthy of her time, emotions and attention. – Most women find themselves in this situation and as much as I want to say she should have put him in his place and not given him the right to treat her like yesterday’s trash, I know first hand what it is like to love someone dearly and struggle to find a life without that person in the picture. It takes a lot to pull through from that phase.

Another scene that struck a chord was when Kourtney said ” I don’t think you are a bad guy, because you cheated on me, I forgave you.”

Leonard replied ‘ Why?’

Kourtney said ” Because you are my best friend”- This took me back to the many times my friends and I have discussed how easy it is for a woman to take back a cheating partner and how hard it is for a man to forgive let alone take back an unfaithful partner.

I am beyond certain that if the reverse was the case between Kourney and Leonard,the video would not have seen the light of day.

The final thing that struck me Leonard’s last words, ” I apologise for hurting your feelings, I hope we can be good friends” – I felt like that was a slap on Koutney’s face after all the misdeeds he had confessed to. Evidently he does not have any atom of respect left for her and as expected he is not one to understand the meaning of respect and regard.

Overall,I believed this video outlined a situation that is not new to the dating sector but it is something we disregard on a regular. I wish Leonard had the decency to break up with Kourtney when he realised they were not on the same page, I wished Leonard was not lucky enough to meet someone who he describes as ‘the perfect girlfriend’,I wished Kourtney was strong enough to cut him off when he started to misbehave but this is the reality we live in, so if you know someone who is in the same situation, show them this video, it might just help.

“The biggest coward is a man who awakens a woman’s love with no intention of loving her” – Bob Marley

Sometimes you did not do anything wrong, you were just perfect and he had no idea what to do with all of that, hence the reason things did not work out. Remember that!


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One comment on “He Cheated On Her & She Wants To Know Why – The Perfect Definition Of The 21st Century Relationship”

  1. roseline

    I can totally relate to this.

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