Communication Differences in Relationships
I was listening to an amazing man of God on YouTube (Bishop TD Jakes), and he said: “When a woman cares about something, she usually verbalizes it but when a man cares about something, he sometimes internalizes.” I paused for a minute and realised that what he said is actually true to an extent. You see Ladies, I know it’s not easy to comprehend but sometimes when you are in the mood to discuss something important and your man is quiet, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t care; he may just be thinking about how to get the family out of the situation or he may be thinking of how to solve the situation. To be honest, it is not easy being a woman but it is also not easy being a man; the society has put them under so much so much pressure, (They are to be the head, the teacher, the leader, the protector, the father, the husband etc….) Thus, their financial obligations, family commitments, marital expectations, work deadlines put them under pressure to be rich / successful…All these different responsibilities they have also make them think deeply as opposed to thinking on the surface.
Nevertheless, a good man, loves & wants to provide for his home and make sure his wife doesn’t use all of her money to pay the bills. However, even though he wants her to enjoy his money, a good woman should support her man and also understand his mode of communication. As Wives & Wives-in-Waiting (WWIW), we have to be our (“HHIW”) Husband & Husband-in-waiting’s closest friend and not just his WWIW, so that he will be comfortable to tell you the things he keeps bottled in his mind without fear of the unknown. Also our darling HHIW, please share your emotions / thoughts with your WWIW, help her understand that you may not feel like talking now because you are working on a solution, but you will still discuss the issue when you have assimilated everything in your mind; that way, she won’t be frustrated or think you are ignoring her or being quiet for no reason. I didn’t know this before but I am consciously learning a lot about the male species and I realise now, that we are very different from you men in so many ways; so please help us understand you and we will help you understand us too. Lastly Ladies, be patient with your man, be his bestie and his confidant, try not to tell your relatives / friends his weaknesses, pray for him and ask God to give you the grace to understand him, support him, obey him, talk to him politely and also ask for the grace to listen to him when he tells you things. Men, you also need to say this prayer.
May God bless our homes in Jesus name, amen.